Classic SLN: Mystery Science Theater 3000 (2008)

Recently, Gemma Cleanslate wrote on the Mystery Science Theater 3000 in Second Life. I had come across the place before, in 2008. And in writing about it for Second Life Newspaper, I did so in a humorous style that Editor Dana loved to the point it was one of our exhibition articles at the SL5B later on. With the close of SLN, however, the article became blocked from view, so here it is again. There have been a number of changes at the place since it was written, so keep in mind this isn't exactly the same ship. Things change in four years.

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From 1988 to 1999 the show Mystery Science Theater 3000, also known as MST3K for short, hilariously poked fun at B-rated science fiction flicks. Attracting a cult following, the show was so popular, to watch a bad tv show with friends just to openly make fun of the lame bits became known as to “Mist” it.

I heard there was a tribute to MST3K here in Second Life, owned by a Squeebee Wakawaka in the BlaksleeWorld sim at (196/160/24). I put visiting the place on my “to do” list. However, the arrival of a couple visitors at the newspaper office sped up my plans a little.

Crow: Look Tom, a fox in a hat and coat!

Me: Wha- what are you doing here?

Crow: Look Tom, a fox in a hat and coat that talks!

Tom Servo: Looks like Rupert Murdock is out to take over the newspapers as well as TV news.

After a short conversation, I brought up the MST3K place here, and the two robots were curious and agreed to go there with me. So we teleported over.

Crow: Wooooooosh! Ah! I can’t see, I’m blind! Oh wait, that’s just the lag here.

Tom Servo, Welcome to Second Lag, where you too can hurry up and wait.

It wasn’t long though before the scene became clear. There stood two large statues of two familiar robots, with a certain ship behind them.

Crow: That does not look like me!

Tom Servo: Really? I thought that mustache looked rather fitting on you.

Crow: And is that the Satellite of Love? Oh noes! It’s half sunken into the ground. The apes have taken over! You idiots! You blew it up! Darn you all to heck!

Tom Servo: Wasn’t that supposed to be “Damn you all to Hell?”

Crow: The last time I used that line, I was in a PG sim and got booted.

We then went around to the front of the ship, at least we thought it was the front. The ship was next to some water with a big fish about to eat a motorboat and a small inner tube near the ship.

Tom Servo: Boy that fisherman didn’t just use special bait, he was the special bait.

Crow: Maybe that’s some college goldfish swallowing initiation. The goldfish swallow them.

When we got closer to the door, it opened and we stepped into the Bridge. For a Bridge, it was pretty bare, just a few screens, but the panel that told everyone “We got movie” will be unmistakable to the fans. There were also a couple vendors which sold items related to the show from Joel’s uniform, to statues, to a Tom Servo avatar.

Crow: Look Tom, you’re for sale!

Tom Servo: I demand a cut of every transaction. And I’m going to have to ask Joel to modify me again. I don’t want a thousand of me running around.

Crow: But think of your fans.

Tom Servo: Hey, here’s one of you too.

Crow: What? I’ve been robbed. Call a lawyer! Hey fox, you wouldn’t happen to know a legal weasel, would you?

I tried pressing the button to activate the “door sequence” leading to the movie theater, but it wouldn’t work. Poking my hand through the bone-shaped-hinge, it went through.

Crow: Holograms! We’ve been had all these years! They were never able to just off oxygen to just the bridge to force Joel to watch movies!

So we then went through the door sequence, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, and through the final door into the theater. We found the movie screen with one of the numerous cheesy flicks that aired, with the familiar shilluetes of Joel and the two robots, poking fun at it all the way as always. And in the seats were over a dozen people watching, and joking it along with them, some using language the three never did.

Tom Servo: I have this strange feeling, like there is an audience sitting right behind me, and laughing along with me.

Crow: They can’t do this to us! We have a copyright on riffinig bad movies!

And so, Crow went off to look for someone to complain to. I thought about asking the man behind the sales counter what he might know. But instead, Tom Servo and I got seats, and sat to watch this “so cheesy you could smell the parmesan” for a while. The wisecracks, like in the TV show, were the real entertainment.

Eventually, it was time to go, but not before some final words from the robots.

Crow: Good luck next time at the chicken coop.

Me. Ha ha. Very funny.

Tom Servo: And what’s with that hat and overcoat? Shouldn’t you be wearing a space pilot’s outfit or something and hanging out with a girl named ‘Krystal?’

It was then that I parted company with the two robots.

Friday evenings are the best time to show up as that’s when the MSTK fans meet reguarly for the weekly feature. One can also see the flicks in a lounge chair and TV at the shore near the robot statues, but it’s not nearly as fun

Bixyl Shuftan