By Lia (Female Winslet)
Upon arrival at The Lounge: Jazz By The Bay, my first impression was that the venue was small, possibly a recently opened club. DJ Speelo was playing reasonably good tunes, although his mic work needs improvement. He seems to interrupt tunes haphazardly and sounds as if he is shouting over the music. I had been there before in an anthro form, and this was all what I had experienced before.
Mr. Mimulus immediately began sending me instant messages telling me that formal dress was required. Confused by why he would be telling me this, I said I understood that and I was using a quadruped avatar. He again told me that formal dress was required. I pointed out that quadruped avatars typically do not wear clothes. He again reiterated that formal dress was required.
It took me a few minutes to realize why Mr. Mimulus kept telling me that formal attire was required. Until then, my experience had been that clubs either do allow furries or they don’t. And the typical dress code at a formal dress venue, if furries are allowed, is something like the one at Sweetheart’s, which states "4 legged furries must wear fur and 2 legged furries must be fully clothed please."
Eventually, I realized that the problem at The Lounge: Jazz By The Bay was with my avatar. Because quadruped avatars do not normally wear clothing, Mr. Mimulus wanted me to change avatars, not just clothing. I told him that I do not change avatars for anyone except myself, but I would leave if my avatar posed a problem for him. He confirmed that he would like me to leave, and I did.
I reached out to xaphyre.ansar, the club owner, to describe what had happened. I asked if it was correct that quadruped avatars are not welcome at The Lounge. She confirmed it was, explaining the policy this way: "[W]e discriminate against anyone not wearing clothes[.]"
Discrimination against furries is nothing new in Second Life. Frank’s Place is a particularly infamous example. But this was my first experience with a partial furry ban, in this case one affecting only the feral members of our community. It was also the first time that I have seen a furry choose to work enforcing a ban on members of his own community.
I hope that the club owner will recognize that discrimination is not the way to go. Until then, I hope that furries and our friends will boycott this club. And I hope that Benj Mimulus will stop enforcing a discriminatory ban against a part of his own community. He should never have taken this job and, if the policy does not change quickly, he should resign and go work in a place where all are welcome. As a furry himself, his active participation in discrimination against his own community provides xaphyre.ansar with a degree of cover to claim that the partial furry ban is okay.
Lia
Editot's note: the picture is of the avatar in question at a club that is happy to have well-behaved visitors, regardless of appearance (as long as larger ones are careful where they step).
If you want to go to a fancy place, just put some pants on!
ReplyDeleteI would like to comment on this article.
ReplyDeleteThousands of people come to Second Life wanting to pursue some existence, Some want to be furry, some want to be human. Some want to be vampires, some want to be quad animals and so on. There are as many reasons for being in SL as there are people.
Some people want to be DJs, others want to perform live. Some want to own venues and give everyone else a place to pursue what they want, whatever that may be.
The only reason I think any of it works at all is that we understand this. Everyone's vision of who they are and what the want out of SL is probably going to be different. As long as we make the effort to get along and respect one another, SL works.
I am an anthropomorphic fox. Once a week, I host at a Jazz club that has a dress code. The owner wanted to have a formal venue; a place where people could put on a suit or a dress and come listen to music. She liked the idea of dressing up in SL. It's a major reason as to why she is in SL.
She understood that there were a lot of different people out there and made the 'rules' of her venue as inclusive as she could while still being focused on what she wanted out of her experience here. It didn't matter to her if you were a horse of a cat or a fox or a robot or a human. As long as you were polite and gave a nod to what she wanted in SL, everyone was more than welcome.
A week ago a friend showed up at the Club while I was hosting. I had invited her and mentioned that there was a dress code. She had been to the club before, in an avatar in which she is usually seen. This time she arrived this time as a quadroped robotic animal, sans formal or semi-final clothing. Being the host, I again mentioned that there was a dress code, and if she could pop into her normal AV, that would be great.
She refused, stating that she changed her AV for no one but herself. She went on to comment that she was dead set against this kind of discrimination. She sent a note to the owner of the club, and then unfriended and banned me. This last bit hurt, as we had been friends. More, it made any attempt at discussion and resolution impossible.
In my opinion, this is not how you fight discrimination. Indeed, it's perpetuating it.
Lia, your demands that others accept, include and accommodate YOUR personal choices in every way is a little shy of narcissism, to be quite frank. We ALL have the right to choose the rules of the environment we circulate in. We all actively choose the sort avatars we want to wear, the sort of image we want to represent, and the group of people we wish to associate with, your putting my club down because we have a dress code as a biased and discriminating place seems inordinately unfair and equally biased. If I want to run around naked in SL guess what: I go to an adult nudist sim, I don't feel discriminated against because I can't run around naked everywhere I go. Your behavior and response is petulant and immature at best, demanding that everyone should accept YOUR personal choices. Whether you like it or not, accept it or not, validate it or not, there is a place and a time for everything, and I stand behind my choice to have a dress code at my club, and stand behind my friend who was simply doing his job and requesting that this dress code be enforced. I ask it of EVERYONE who visits my club, not just furries. If you don't like the club, the furnishings, the style, the accommodations, and if you find the DJ and the music below your standards then I'm glad you frequent Sweetheart's, I'm sure that is more suited to your tastes as well. We are a friendly club who welcomes anyone who wishes to a) Listen to great Jazz, b) be respectful of our ONE rule: everyone must be wearing clothes. Anyone not feeling up to this is welcome to choose a different locale to frequent, but don't make this a petulant vendetta because the world in whole doesn't conform to YOUR wishes and choices of lifestyle whatever this may be. By the way, I don't like Frank's either, they never play anything resembling Jazz, hahaha!
ReplyDelete_/|\_ namaste Lia, drop the chip off your shoulder and don't run around trying to put others down because they didn't roll out the red carpet for you.
oh and for the record, no one BANNED you, you are always free to come visit. We reserve the banning whip for griefers and people who come to cause trouble and mayhem.
ReplyDeleteSo basically the owner and Unknown just confirmed that feral furries are prohibited?
ReplyDeleteIf you do not wish the negative reviews you should not be making objectionable rules. While I can understand wanting naughty bits covered up, banning an avatar that does not have any to be covered, or that does not wear clothing (due to being an animal, robot, etc.) is just plain silly. And it WILL generate negative reviews on blogs such as this. As a club owner you will get lashback for any controversial rules you create. And since Lia did not actually bash your club (other then a rather pleasant protest about the no quadrupeds rule) I do not see that you have anything to complain about. She is merely informing others of this rule. Many will avoid such a club if they are furries, or play other types of avatars that do not require or wear clothing. If you do not like people making others aware of the rule you should not have made it.
ReplyDeleteJadon, I'll ask you this then. How would you replicate in SL a club where, if it existed in the real world, people would be expected to dress up nicely for it?
DeleteWhat bothers me most about this is how Lia handled this situation. She immediately blocked anyone who didn't share her opinion, refusing to discuss the situation with the club's owner. She decided to end her friendship with me and block me as well. If you really desire to end perceived discrimination, this is not how you do it. As I mentioned earlier, the path Lia took only leads to hurt feelings and worse. It colors not only how people view Lia, but furs in general.
I've been a fur for all the 10 years I've been in SL, and I've been booted out of more places for being a fur than I care to count. The way I've dealt with it in the past was to try to meet the people involved, discuss the issue when I could and show them that furs are people too. I would like to think that I have made a difference, and I will continue to make that difference in this fashion.
Furs in SL are not 'at war' with humans, and there isn't a contest to see who can pack more members of their tribe into a venue. Again, in order for SL to work in any kind of enjoyable way, we have to understand that we all come to SL for different reasons, and we need to communicate with one another, rather than to bash one another for being a fur, or for wanting to run a formal club.
Well, if Unknown thinks it is fine to request his friend either change avatars or leave, then I am sure he will not mind if anyone asks him to either change out of his furry avatar or leave.
ReplyDeleteBut I am tired of reading how hurt he is by losing his friend. Sounds like he can’t bring himself to say sorry. And I guess I wonder why he’d be working in a place where his friends aren’t welcome?
Benj Mimulus here. Contact me in SL for conformation if you need to. Simply, I am sorry Lia made the choices she did and I believe that it was well within the rights of the club owner to determine both the theme of her club and any dress code therein. Xaphyr's dress code is simple: Wear nice clothes. My friends, human, scaley, furry, alien and what have you are welcome there, and many of my friends, including Lia, have been there. Xaphyr has also made it clear that everyone is welcome as long as they do this one simple thing, be nice, and perhaps mind their script impact on the club. I do not think this is unreasonable in the least.
DeleteI think Anonymous.. you are self-centered and self important.. you don't like the dress codes don't go.. But i as a large landholder on Second life find the idea of you getting to dictate anything to me with some kind of militant attitude or social extortion a larger wrong that the one you are pretending to protest in this way .. are you an arm twisting thug? Do you think anyone cares outside of your militant little cabal ? I'm not sorry for Lia she made her bed.. and i hope she chokes on her own cream in the situation .. none of you speak for the larger majority of furs.. and allot of us would appreciate if you would seriously shut the hell up.. you are not a solution .. you are an exaltation to furtherance of what has become passe and silly.. people have a right to ban furs.. flat out.. furs have a right to ban humans and do.. lets not make up reasons to do it..
DeleteHello, Lia here. I'm currently at a furry con in RL, so not paying a lot of attention to this.
ReplyDeleteI would just like to say that I completely agree with Benj, Xaphyre, and Anonymous. The SL TOS absolutely permits land owners to ban furries--either all of them or just some of them.
But it is still disappointing that they choose to do so.
All the stuff about my being friends with Benj or not is a personal matter that doesn't belong here. Benj says some things about me that are incorrect and I will leave it at that.
Lia, your hubris is astounding.. you don't get to dictate things, not here, not in second life, you sure give it the ole collage try don't you though. How about instead of bitching and whining about something minor like a rusty hinge, do something positive. make a furry place you can run like you want. and quit trying to tell other people how to run what they spend the money you either cant afford or are unwilling to spend, hmm ? Next time why don't you try to vote with your feet, which i respect, and keep your mouth out of it, i love how you think you get to tell everyone else what belongs or doesn't .. you only get to do that for yourself and what you create.. and as far as disappointing goes. I find it disappointing that in so many situations yours will be the only opinion voiced.. and you will block people to keep from having a healthy discourse.
DeleteI would block you too with your attitude. That is not healthy discourse. That is seeking to cause drama with arguing and belittling. Lia did not try to dictate anything. She voice her opinion on the matter and stated her side of things. She has chosen not to associate with those that discriminate against furies, which is her right. Continuing to be friends with someone who supports such discrimination would be hypocritical of her to say the least, so I applaud her unfriending someone that does support such discrimination. Having visited many different sims it amazes me at the lack of acceptance for different groups. Some are worse then others. I have been to sims and stores in SL that banned me for wearing neko ears.
DeleteTrump supporters of the world unite and bash Lia! How dare she voice an opinion different from ours!
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